There and Back Again with My Long Time Friend

I just finished re-visiting one of my favorite characters in literary fiction.  

Mr. Bilbo Baggins and I just finished our journey "There and Back Again" for the umpteenth time.  I have known Mr. Baggins for the greater three quarters of my life. I remember when I first linked that funny looking red-headed cartoon character to this marvelous book.  I remember my 4th grade teacher reading it to us in school, and later having to write an essay in the 8th grade.Each and every time I find something new that I love about being a hobbit.

I was inspired for my latest read by several people that I follow on Twitter.  In lieu of the new movie coming out (Click here to see the trailer), August was deemed "The Hobbit" month.  Needless to say I spent the first three weeks of August reading what everyone else had to say about their re-visit or first time visit down the hobbit hole.  I finally caved, (book #35 on my 50 book pledge was chosen), and I took the journey to defeat Smaug once again.

One of the things that I like the most about "The Hobbit" is it's straight forward simplicity. Simplicity, mind you, that later turns a little more complex when one carries on the adventure in "The Lord of the Rings".  Yet "The Hobbit" manages to stay as a quick, exciting, straight-forward read, which leaves you feeling as though you've been on an epic journey.  I've found that many books I've recently read tend to focus on descriptions focusing of every single tiny detail that each and every character is thinking, feeling, doing, and seeing ("The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" - I don't really care how many cokes Lisbeth Salander drinks in a day, yet Mr. Larsson had each and every one of them well documented), resulting in something that should only be a few hundred pages, turning into something that is rather long and heavy to hold for the duration of the adventure.  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE epic reads, but they have to actually be epic, complex, AND exciting.

Through the whole book there are terms along the lines of "poor Mr. Baggins", which I like to think of as sarcastic by the end.  Mr. Baggins is not poor by any means.  His hobbit hole is a marvel in architecture, so much so that his relatives could not wait to get their hands on it, and he ate several meals a day, no poor person could afford either.  Mr. Baggins is the shit!  Inexperienced in everything, away from home and not only did he carry the dwarves through their journey, he rescued them time and time again.  He endured and persevered.  And, yes, like everyone else, he missed the comforts of home, but you can't honestly tell me that Bombur wasn't hungry or that Fili and Kili didn't miss their own beds.  So, "poor Mr. Baggins", it must suck to be so awesome.

This re-read was just as good as every other time that I've read this book.  I smiled at Gandalf's fireworks, and I almost refused to read "Flies and Spiders", simply because I hate the though of giant spiders, and I still remembered the answers to the riddle game with Gollum.  The trip down the river in the apple barrels still leaves me feeling clausterphobic.  And I could still feel Bilbo's pride and confidence grow each, and every, time he defied the odds and showed the world what a quiet homebody can accomplish if their mind is set.

Needless to say, deeming August as a time to re-read "The Hobbit" was a marvelous idea, kudos to whoever thought of it :)

50 Book Pledge Part II (update)

So continuing on:

11)  The Ninja Handbook by Douglas Sarine & Kent Nichols

12)  Percy Jackson & the Olympians Book Four: The Battle of the Labyrinth by Rick Riordan

13)  Odd Thomas by Dean Koontz

14)  Betrayed by PC & Kristin Cast

15)  Cabal by Clive Barker

16)  Generation A by Douglas Coupland

17)  The Alchemist by Michael Scott

18)  His Majesty's Dragon by Naomi Novik

19)  Postmortem by Patricia Cornwell

20)  Empire of Silver by Conn Iggulden

21)  A Clash of Kings by George R. R. Martin

22)  The Maze Runner by James Dashner

23)  Insurgent by Veronica Roth

24)  50 Shades of Grey by E.L. James - Yes, I read this, curiosity got the best of me.  Besides, who doesn't like good porn?

25)  Tess of the D'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy

26)  Body of Evidence by Patricia Cornwell

50 Book Pledge

As part of my new years resolution for 2012 I've decided to embark on the 50 Book Pledge (again), but this time I've got one of these fancy badges.   It's March 1st and I'm 10 books in, so I thought I would post what I've read so far. 

1) Bones of the Hills by Conn Iggulden

2) Knots & Crosses by Ian Rankin

3) The Last Archangel by Elliot Cross

4) Inheritance by Christopher Paolini

5) Marked by PC and Kristin Cast

6) A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens

7) The Vampire Diaries The Return: Nightfall by LJ Smith

8) The Strange Case of Finley Jane by Kady Cross

9) The Girl Who Played With Fire by Stieg Larsson

10) Great Feuds in Science - Ten of the Liveliest Disputes Ever by Hal Hellman

As you can tell from this list, I read pretty much anything that falls into my line of sight and grabs my attention.  I'm open to suggestions if anyone has them :)

Scattered Thoughts

Sometimes I sit back and wonder what people think of me.  I don't do this often and when I do, I usually come to the same conclusion:  I am awesome and logically everyone should think that I am awesome too.

I have idiosyncrasies.  Mr. Awesome refers to these as my "quirks" (sounds like "perks" but better because it starts with a "Q", I like "Q" words, you don't see them in every sentence).  They are weird things, like needing to have the right weight to a coffee cup, and not being able to sleep properly, and compulsive list making, and drinking sparkly fruit soda from wine glasses, and getting overly excited about my "nerdy science things".  Though I am told sometimes that my "quirks" get a little out of hand at times, they are for the most part adorable. 

Today I read an article about bionic bacteria (bacteria capable of producing proteins using unnatural amino acids) = awesome.  OK, my biotech geek may have slipped out just a little bit there.  To contrast the biotech geek; I also read an article about the how to cook perfect scallops, a useful skill if one ever finds out Chef Ramsey is coming to sup.  Yes I used the term "sup", I like it, and I decided that it is not used enough, so I used it (I also used it in a recent Facebook status).  I think my use of strange/outdated words falls into that "quirk" category.

This picture always makes me smile and it's fall time now:

I'm pretty sure that my puppies are much, much smarter than they let on.  One day we came home and one of the three was watching out the window.  "Awwww how cute, Ninja missed us", followed by barking when he heard us unlocking the front door.  Open the door - the other two were pulling the garbage apart and all three scramble to hide (because maybe the humans won't figure out who ripped the garbage apart)...  We are now almost positive that Ninja did not miss us and he was actually acting as the lookout while the other two rooted through the garbage for something good.


I like crayons and rainbows.  Rainbow flavored crayons are the best ----  Um ya, see the weird shit that comes out when my mind just wanders.  Rainbow flavored crayons?  WTF?


My coffee cup is empty and I'm hungry.

Appreciating the small things.

I tried and tried to come up with a brilliant, "I love you" post for our anniversary yesterday and I just couldn't top the one I wrote last year.  And even though it's been another full year and we've faced some of our most severe obstacles, we are still the same as we always have been.  I love Dustin, he is my world and he loves me, I am his everything, etc, etc, etc.  Mush, mush, mush.  It's pretty self explanatory.

We have a baby and she's grown up tremendously.  It's been amazing to watch her learn everything there is to know about just being alive and she's shown me how to appreciate it more than I could have ever imagined.  I've had a hard time over the last year with coming to terms with not being in control of everything that happens in my life.  I used to feel that I was in control of everything, including the death of a very close friend, yes I blamed myself, horrible, I know, but it's the truth and it was very, very hard on me, especially when I came to the realization that it wasn't my fault.

Despite all the odds, and all the precautions, and against what should have happened, I ended up as less than 0.1% and it almost killed me.  After having control of myself ripped out of my hands, I've learned that I can't predict everything.  I can't prepare for anything, and I am definitely not responsible for all the things that happen in my life.  I don't talk about what happened, and I don't talk about my feelings, there's no reason to.  Life carries on as usual.  Dustin stood by my side, like I knew he would, we hoped for the best, and we smiled in spite of everything and everything worked itself out.

I don't like to look at things in the perspective of "oh my god, I almost died", and I definitely know Dustin tries not to think "my wife just about died", but it happened and it changed us both.  Despite everything I have a whole new outlook on life and it's a good one.  I am still here for a reason and I am trying as hard as I can to be the best me that I can be.  I no longer blame myself for things out of my control, and I am grateful every morning when I wake up, alive.  I breathe deep when it rains, and I soak in the sun when it's hot.  I try every day to smile for no reason.  I am definitely not the same person I was a year ago.  I'm happier, more relaxed, and even though I found humor in the small things before, now they really make my day.

Thank-you Dustin for standing beside me in sickness and in health.  Thank-you for not pushing me when I don't want to be pushed.  Thank-you for not letting me see you crack under the worst imaginable pressure.  And thank-you most for letting me deal with things in my own strange ways.  You are my rock and I love you more than all the cake in the world.

Running Rant

What kind of people strike up a conversation with the girl jogging by with her iPod at full blast?  My neighbors, that's who.  Come on people, there is a time for idle chit chat and that time is not when I'm sweating like a pig and in the middle of my 3rd lap.  The friendly "Hello" wave when I ran past you the first time was OK, annoying the second time, but stopping me in the middle of the road on my third pass to ask how my day is?  WTF is wrong with you?  Can't you see I'm busy?  Sorry, but I'm not running past your house because I'm lonely and want you to stop me to chit chat, I'm running to keep my heart rate up.

The comments are a whole other story.  I've been jogging around my block several days a week for over a year and yet the same people feel the need to use the same comments each and every time they see me.  "Oh look at you running again".  Excellent observation Einstein.  It wouldn't be quite so bad if it was just one comment, but there needs to be a comment for each lap (and I usually do between 6 and 10 laps in a given day).  "Another lap, look at you go", "Wow, how many is that now?", "Aren't you getting tired?"... 

I think my annoyances with my neighbors have enforced my already strong love for running in the rain.  Not only do I just enjoy the rain, but I also really enjoy that no one stands outside in their front yard when it's raining.  No one stops to chit chat in the rain.  AND I can always pretend to be one of "those people", the ones that think the rain is going to melt them, so they cover up and run away as fast as they can, and I can do so without feeling like I'm being rude to the people interrupting my attempt at health consciousness.

Ode to My Favorite Sweater

My favorite sweater is probably the ugliest sweater I own, but I love it to pieces anyways.  I bought it when I was 15 at some store in a mall and for 15 years it's been my favorite sweater.  It's not the one that I look the best in, and it's not the one that I reserve for date night.  It's the one that I lay on the couch in, the one that I grab when I'm chilly at home, the one that I won't ever get rid of no matter how holey or threadbear it becomes.  It's my favorite sweater, we've been through too much together to throw it away.

We've snuggled in with a good book, we've warmed each other up, we've gone through good times and bad.  My favorite sweater has shared countless adventures with me; travelling though books and movies and imagination.  We've dreamed together, we've met reality together.  My favorite sweater was there when I got my heart broken (each and everytime), it was there when my pets died, and it was even there when my friend passed away.  It is always there to give a hug.  It's kept me warm when it was cold, and it's kept me dry when it rained.

My favorite sweater is itchy, and it's scratchy, and it's a really ugly shade of brown, but it's still my favorite. It's got two big pockets that I love to shove my hands into, because you can never go wrong with big, warm and cozy pockets. My favorite sweater has a zipper that has never, ever gotten stuck and arms that are just the right length, long enough to cover your whole arm to just where your first knuckle ends.  My favorite sweater is long and it keeps my bum warm, I hate having a cold bum.

My favorite sweater and I have danced in the living room together and we've sung the wrong words.  We've been happy and sad and right pissed off.  We've felt confused, neglected, letdown and damn right miserable.  We've turned things around, we've looked at the bright side, we've weighed options together.   We've started, we've worked, we've acheived, and we've failed.  We've always had each other  My favorite sweater is a part of me.

My favorite sweater has never said anything mean to me.  It's never been rude to me.  It's never made me feel sad or worthless or that it doesn't care.  My favorite sweater is always supportive, and always positive, and always pushing me in the right direction.  I don't care that my favorite sweater is ugly, it fits me perfectly. 

The Furry Family that Lives with Us

We have 3 puppies that live with us.  Well they aren't really puppies, they are all fully grown dogs, but they are little so I like to think of them as puppies.  And when I say they live with us, I mean I don't feel that I "own" them, we live together in a happy house.  Dust and I work, and they live the sweet life (yes, I do get jealous sometimes). 

We bought Ninja from a pet store when he was almost 3 months old.  I didn't really want a puppy, but Dustin was in LOVE with this one.  On a random day, Dust just stopped in the pet store (because I like to see all the baby animals) and right away the girl at the counter said "Hi, yes he's still here".  Part of me just went "Oh no".  The last little puppy of a litter was sitting by himself in a pen.  Dustin went over and picked him up, held him out to me and just said "Can I please come home with you guys?"  After a rather brief discussion with the girl working the counter and my husband, who desperately wanted this puppy, I found out that he had been in the store almost every day for two weeks visiting this specific puppy.  How on earth was I supposed to say no?  So, Ninjitsu Magoo (aka Monster) officially became a Hyatt.  

Ninjitsu Magoo

We both work full time and I have always been a firm believer in puppies should have friends too, so after living with us for 2 months Ninjitsu needed a girlfriend.  Well, it wasn't really that thought out of a decision.  What actually happened was: We went to the pet store to buy bird treats and dog toys and there was a rolly, polly little girl puppy and I immediately fell in love with her.  Mimzicola Muffet (aka The Phat) came home with us about an hour later. 

Mimzicola Muffet

Ninja and Mimzy fell in love and had 6 babies.  5 boys and 1 girl.  The girl was the last one born and was actually a bit of a surprise in the morning.  I went to bed and there were 5 black little boys snuggling their mommy, and when I woke up in the morning there was an extra puppy and it was white.  Dustin was convinced that we needed to keep the one white girl puppy and after a rather hard time getting rid of all of the boys, she was the only one left.  Panda Bear had her collar and name tag randomly brought home by Dustin one day after work and eventually when people asked if we were getting rid of her the answer changed from "Yes, do you know someone who wants her?" to "Nope".

Panda Bear

So there you have it.  Our puppy family was complete.  Mom, Dad, and Baby Girl.  Ironically it's exactly how our human family worked out too.  Mom, Dad and Baby Girl.

Excursion Imagination

I started going for early morning/nightly walks/runs in my neighborhood over a year ago, in a successful attempt to lose my post-pregnancy weight.  I quickly found that I found it quite enjoyable to walk my dog or push my baby in her stroller, listen to my iPod and let my mind wander.  My excursions started as small walks, as I was extremely out of shape (6 months of bedrest will do that to a person), but I eventually made it to the point where I could run instead of walk (very proud of myself).  It was a long trek but I made it, blah, blah, blah.  No one wants to hear another weight loss story, and I don't like to remember how miserable I was.

I live in a "modular home park" and I say "modular home" because the people in my neighborhood do not live in your average double-wide trailers.  They live in these huge and elaborate double-wide trailers with basements and balconies and attics and double-car garages, etc (you get my point, they are mansion trailers).  I think ours is the smallest house on the block, but it's a nice neighborhood to live in and we actually know each and every one of our 30 neighbors.  The walk around my block is actually quite a work out if you want it to be.  It's short enough that you can run it and it's got enough hill to make a walk a little more than a stroll.

Anyway...

Recently, I've found a new marvelous source of enjoyment on my daily excursions: I make up stories about my neighbors.  Strange elaborate stories.  Remember I said I know all of them.  I know what they look like, I know where lots of them work, I know who belong to which house and I know which ones are Canuck fans, but it ends there.  The rest of the details that I like to make up as I walk past their houses and I don't care if it makes me sound crazy.  I like to pretend.  There are lots of days where I'll thow in an extra lap around the block because I wasn't quite finished with the imaginary story going on with number 12.

Most of my neighbors are "old" people, though there are a few younger people mixed in as well.  The neighbors that I talk to on a regular basis have quite interesting stories and I wonder what else they may have done and the ones that I don't talk to regularly are the ones that my brain picks on the most.  I'm pretty sure of several crazies and I know there's a few recreational drug users and I know one of the widows is getting married this summer, but the made up stuff is so much more interesting.  Like the man who only eats cabbage and that's why he smells the way he does.  Or the couple that attends every church function but sacrifices a lamb to the Devil every full moon.  Or the girl that I am pretty sure is some sort of non-human entity with supernatural powers. 

So, now that I've said this, I'm starting to wonder what my neighbors think of me... 

Rick Mercer and Snowdays

So I was watching the Rick Mercer report on TV a little while ago and I had this epiphany that I thought I should share.  Lately I've noticed that people in general are seemingly  more crabby than usual.  Even the normally overly cheerful people are looking as though they have a few rough edges.  I've noticed that more people are trying their hardest just to get through another monotonous day at work/home/wherever, And it wasn't until Mr. Mercer gave his rant on snowdays that I had a clue why. 

Before my very eyes people have been falling victim to the Winter Blues.  That's right.  People around me hate this time of year and instead of taking it in stride or thinking the best or even trying to use this time of year as a recharge session, they decide to use the fluffy snow and the cold air as an excuse to sit around and mope about everything in their lives that they aren't happy about. 

We live in Canada.  This means that every year for at least two months it is cold, snowy, windy, icy, and just plain shitty outside.  So why not use this time to do those things that are so often put aside.  Catch up on some TV, read a good book, use crayons to make elaborate To Do lists, do something that makes you smile.  Find something to humor yourself with.  Or find something constructive to do.  But please, for the love of "God", please stop whining about it.  Waaaa it snowed...  Darn it, I guess I don't have to go mow the lawn and pull weeds, and pick up the dog shit out in the yard.  I am free to play a video game, go sledding, have a bubble bath, and wonder what the gnomes on the windowsill are thinking.  SMILE dammit!

Anyways, I digress.  This is my favorite time of year.  I like the cold, I like the snow, I even like shoveling the snow.  Tobogganing is fun, snowboarding is fun, watching my puppies play in the snow is fun.  That nice white blanket hides everyone's lawns that are always brown and overgrown by by about August, and I don't have to look at flowerbeds that are overtaken by dandelions.  I know my yard a whole lot less work to maintain in the middle of January than it is in July, I am assuming that this is the case for everyone elses yard as well.

There is no need for that greasy layer of sunscreen and the extra layer of pit-stick because you don't want to burn to death and it's so hot outside that you start sweating before your body even meets the air.  There are days when I can't even go barefoot outside because it burns my feet!  No lie.  I fail to see the logic surrounding how that can possibly make people happy?!!?  How is that better than watching the snowfall and drinking hot chocolate?

Adventures in Wonderland: Found in a Random Binder Somewhere:

Adventures in Wonderland: Found in a Random Binder Somewhere:: "Twelve Thoughts for Today 1) Life is a sexually transmitted disease. 2) Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. 3)..."

Found in a Random Binder Somewhere:

Twelve Thoughts for Today

1) Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

2)  Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

3)  Men have two emotions:  Hungry and Horny.  If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

4)  Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day:  teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

5)  Some people are like Slinkies.  Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

6) Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

7)  Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

8)  All of us could take a lesson from the weather.  It pays no attention to criticism.  

9)  Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

10)  In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird.  Now the world is weird and people take Prozac  to make it normal.

11)  Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession.  I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

12)  You read about all these terrorists.  Most of them come here legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15 years.  Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are two days late with a video and those people are all over you.  I think we should put Blockbuster in charge of immigration :)

I am thankful for ME :)

So, I have been left all alone for this thanksgiving and I am oh so grateful.  It's not that I don't like my family, in fact I am rather fond of them.  It's just that there is someone that I rarely get to spend time with that I love and I miss terribly.  That person is ME.  Since the Muk Muk was born I have spent a grand total of 20 minutes with ME in our home.  20 minutes in almost a year.  That is no where near enough time to form a stable relationship.  The last time Me and I got to spend any time together was when I traveled to Surrey to visit my Tanya back in May.  I read a whole, rather large, book on that trip and came home feeling refreshed and ready for the return to life.  But, unfortunately life runs me down sometimes and I need a break, and I am not one of those people to shy away and say "I don't deserve it".  I work hard.  I definitely deserve a good "break" now and again.  

Dust spent a LOT of weekends this summer "away" (gone from morning till night) playing baseball, so he felt I deserved a break.  Friday he packed up the Muk Muk and took her to visit Gramma & Grampa H for thanksgiving and was gracious enough to tell me that I wasn't invited (oh, and he even remembered to buy a turkey so that he could have leftovers when he got back).  So even though he sounds kind of like an ass here, he's definitely not.  He knows me better than I know myself, and he knows I need this time for me.  He even gave me something that I enjoy doing to do (that would be the turkey, cooking and me are also very good friends). 

So, now I've spent the last 24 hours catching up on sleep, playing with my puppies (who I think also miss ME), conversing with my Penguin, watching hockey, reading books, taking bubble baths, roasting turkey, and drinking coffee, the "good" kind.  As you can see, I am not taking this time lightly, I am doing some serious relaxing here.  There is no BS house-cleaning, or errands, or crap like that.  I am being ME, I am loving every second, and I am definitely trying not to waste any time "missing" anyone.

But, despite my best efforts, I do miss the baby snores through the monitor at night, and the big boy snores in the bed beside me.  I got up last night to pee and was confused that there was no diaper to change, or sleepy baby to cuddle.  This morning I could leave my brightly colored coffee cup on the coffee table with no worries that it would get thrown on the floor and broken (FYI I have an emotional attachment to each and every one of my coffee mugs).  I also didn't HAVE to watch Sesame Street first thing this morning (I did anyways, I like Cookie Monster).  After I had a shower, I put on a nice clean pair of PJ's and they have stayed nice and clean all day, there is no drool, food crumbs or snot stuck to them (not my drool, food crumbs, or snot...  Missy B's). 

Mimzy dog is good and keeps "checking" on the baby that isn't here.  She wanders into Muk Muk's room and looks in the crib every couple of hours, and then whines cause there's no one there.  Ninja is sucking up as much love as he can get as he has no competition, and Panda is really just the same.  Penguin on the other hand, is a total HAM!  He's been talking more than normal, and has learned some very bad words (*Thank-you very much Mr. Hyatt*).  He's been molting so he's super itchy, which means I get extra snuggles from him (mostly because I pick at his feathers for him, but extra snuggles are extra snuggles).  ME is doing well.  Same old ME.  ME still likes the same things and pretty much hasn't changed much since the last time we got to spend any time together.  So, if you'll excuse us there is a fresh, ice cold beer waiting, and we need to go and cheer for LA (if you don't know me, I'm not an LA fan, I'm just a Canuck hater).

Sleep... Or lack there of.

I had these wonderful intentions of going to bed early last night and for once I actually followed through.  I was in bed and asleep by 9:30!  But, of course, it was the worst sleep that I think I have ever had and coming from me (the master of horrible sleep) that really says something.  Dustin is like a sleep ninja.  He just goes to bed and says "time for sleep" and his entire body just shuts down and off to dreamland he goes for the night.  Once asleep he rarely wakes up until his alarm clock goes off for the first time.  After 9 years I'm still trying to figure out what his trick is.  He tells me he "just goes to sleep".  Yeah must be nice.

I've had trouble sleeping since I can remember.  It's not that my mind wanders, though I do get bored and start thinking about stuff.  It's not that I don't tire myself out during the day.  It's not that I am not tired when I go to bed.  It's not that I don't have a bed time routine, as I do work so I have to stay on somewhat of a schedule.  And once I am asleep I have no trouble staying asleep.  It's the actual getting to sleep part that I have problems with.  

I have tried everything: doctors, sleeping pills, magic teas, lavender baths, etc.  Nothing seems to work, unless you call making me even more tired and cranky working.  I was always told that a human bean needs 8 hours of sleep to function normally.  So I must not be functioning properly if I was only getting 3-5 hours?  Doctors were mildly concerned about my lack of sleep, as like I said, you need 8 hours to function properly, so there must be something wrong with me.  I had blood test after blood test, answered many many questions and there was nothing wrong with me.  I was doing everything right, but most importantly, I wasn't overly tired all the time.  Lots of times I actually feel more rested after 4 hours of sleep than I do when I actually got 8 hours.

Eventually I just gave up fighting my inability to get to sleep.  I have embraced it, come to terms with it, and even worked with it.  Instead of getting mad that I can't get to sleep, I started using that time for more useful things.  I think this worked out slightly in my favor because now, when I have to get up in the middle of the night with the Muk Muk, it isn't that big of a deal.  I am fully functional on 3 solid hours of sleep, though many days in a row of this makes me a little tired-cranky.  I have also started to make sure that I stay in bed for as long as I can to "rest".  Even though I'm not actually sleeping, I still lay in bed which lets my body rest up for the next day.  This might sound a little weird, but it's been working for me for the last 3-4 years.  I let my mind wander, I work out the worlds problems, I plan my week, and all the while my body is resting and rejuvenating itself.  This leaves me feeling like I got more rest than I actually did as opposed to when I would get up and pace the house and get angry that I was missing precious, valuable, platinum sleep (it also let's me organize my life at the mental level).

Despite my history of "bad" sleep habits, last night was terrible.  I actually got a fair amount of sleep and this morning I am so TIRED!  After three cups of coffee I feel like I was hit by a bus and am still squished on the pavement trying to get up.  My head is foggy, my body is still asleep, and my eyes keep drooping.  This better quit soon, because I have to go to work today and use my brain to make some money :)  Stupid, stupid me thinking going to bed early and getting lots of sleep would work out in my favor.

The Collection

As I have mentioned before we just recently finished re-arranging our home so that the Muk Muk would have a larger pasture to safely roam.  In the process of re-arranging, my bookshelf needed to be moved.  Anyone who has seen my bookshelf or has helped move it in the past pretty much ran away when I mentioned that we might need some help with it's migration from our bedroom to our living room.  

Years ago I asked my dad to build me an entertainment unit.  So, my dad, Dustin and I sat down and designed it so that all of our stuff fit perfectly.  Room for our stereo, TV, video game systems, spare parts, DVD's and CD's.  It worked awesome.  That is until the advent of giant flat screen TV's.  When we bought our big TV the intention was that our old TV would migrate (along with the entertainment unit to our room).  This was all fine and dandy until we bought our hobbit house and we would no longer be able to fit my bookshelves and the entertainment unit all in one room.  There was no way my books were moving out so I came up with the brilliant idea to use the shelves and space on the entertainment unit for my books, get rid of our old electronics and bribe Dustin with new stuff for the living room :)  It worked.  Old equipment sold/given away, brand new surround sound for the living room, and a fancy new home for my beloved books and there they lived until we decided that the shelf needed to migrate to the living room.

Needless to say, my books needed to come off of their giant shelf before the shelf itself could even be budged.  So I spent some time pulling the books off of the shelf and arranging them neatly in order on our bed.  This is the first time I have EVER seen my books all spread out.  I took pictures :)

Andy was nice enough to come and help us move the giant shelf (*thanks*) to it's new home in our living room and then I had to embark on the task of moving all the books from the bed to the shelf in the living room all the while keeping them in my OCD order.  This job could have been easier and would have been done in about 20 minutes if I had allowed Dustin to help me, but he doesn't understand why things need to go where they belong, so I argued to do it myself.  Obviously, I had to finish my task before bed time (as the books were napping on our bed) so it turned out to be a good thing that I had kept them in order in their transfer from the shelf to the bed (otherwise I think it is a strong possibility that I would still be arranging them now).  Anyways, here's the horrid bookshelf that sends everyone running whenever I need it moved.

Lord Hunger Fly

So, I embarked on The Hunger Games.  Interesting plot, moved quickly, slightly predictable though.  My personal thought was that the author did too much bending to her will.  Every time the plot was getting "tough" (as in it was getting hard to go in the direction she wanted it to) Suzanne Collins just made something "magical" happen that would shift the plot back into the right direction.  The overall plot was really good, and I like the dystopian future that she had set up and I will read the following two books in the series just to read more about it.  I'm a rather large fan of the dystopian future books.  Anthem by Ayn Rand = Best book ever.  Also high up on the list are Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood, Brave New World by Aldous Huxley, Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury and 1984 by Mr. Orwell.

Anyways, as I was making my way through The Hunger Games, I kept having remote flashbacks to another book about children killing each other.  I read Lord of the Flies in two of my English classes, so I've heard my fair share of lecturing on it, but alas I am getting old and I felt a re-read was in order as all I could really remember about reading it was how sorry I had felt for Piggy.  Poor poor Piggy.  So right after finishing The Hunger Games (as I had to wait for Amazon.com to process and ship my order for the next book in the series - Catching Fire) I dusted off my old copy of Lord of the Flies and once again got lost on that island with Ralph, Jack, Piggy, Sam n' Eric.  No one will ever have to remind me to never to get on a plane full of boys from a British private school.

I must say that I was surprised my remote flashbacks were fairly accurate.  Re-reading Lord of the Flies let me see some more similarities as well and I think it would be an interesting thesis topic for someone going in a literary direction.  I'm sure Suzanne Collins has read Lord of the Flies at some point in her life, but maybe not and I do wonder if those similarities were created on purpose or subconsciously.  Maybe I can google it or something....  *googles*...  And upon my googling adventures I have come across several people/blogs/sites/etc. that have drawn similar conclusions to mine: there are definite parallels between these two books, and according to these two I need to watch Battle Royale

Fuzzy Pants for Hobbits.

It's been pretty dreary outside lately making it hard to motivate myself to do much of anything.  I have vowed to this year get all of our fall clean up done before the new year is rung in.  But alas, I am now going to use the weather as an excuse for my lack of motivation to clean out the camper, get the lawn mowed and clear off the deck.  It has just started POURING outside and rain walks are the best!  After the Muk Muk was born and I was through recovering from surgery Muk Muk and I went for a walk every day, rain, snow, wind, hail, sun, you name it we were out walking around our neighborhood.  Not so much anymore since I've gone back to work, but we still try to go as much as possible.  Both of us LOVE walk time, but the best walks are always the ones in the rain.  Everyone else is holed up in their nice warm, dry homes and we are out laughing and running through puddles :) and the evil old man who lives up the road is never outside when it's raining.  AND our house has a pretty good view, overlooks the lake and mountains and trees.  So when the rain lets up we get some pretty wicked awesome rainbows too :)  Best part of a rainy day.

Dustin and I have recently almost completed the rearrangement of the inside of our home so that the Muk Muk can roam freely without getting killed (literally, we did not have a safe house at all!). We have a LOT of stuff, so this was no simple remodel. Before we even had a baby our house was full right to the brim with stuff that we use on an almost daily basis, so fitting in a crib and finding new homes for all of our things was quite the task then and we didn't have the safety factor to worry about. Oh and I may have forgotten to mention that the actual size of our house would be more suited for a family of hobbits. Perhaps if our stuff was hobbitsized we wouldn't have had to pack up boxes of stuff to store until the Muk Muk is older and able to understand that throwing knives aren't toys. 

I am running out of days to reach my goal and after re-arranging the inside of our home I have completely run out of motivational energy to get the outside stuff finished up.  So today should be the day that I tackle at least part of the outside clean-up to do list.  But it's raining.  So perhaps my highlights today should include a walk in the rain followed by a hot shower and fuzzy pants. 

The yardwork can wait for yet another day...

Birthday Weekend Carport Camping

Saturday was my favorite person's birthday and even though we tried super hard to celebrate, it seemed like everything we tried was a complete and utter failure.  Every year he is lucky enough to have his birthday fall somewhere on the September long weekend, which has resulted in that entire weekend being dedicated to the birth of Dustin (everyone else just gets one day, but he figures he deserves 4 and to avoid any further conflict I just let him have them).  Me being the pre-planner that I am found an awesome present two MONTHS ago and ordered it, and we planned an epic camping trip 3 WEEKS ago.  But do you think his present got here before Friday? You think we had a marvelous time camping for the weekend?  Hells no.  

We spent Friday in Vernon shopping and going for lunch baby  free (Thanks so much Monica) and then we packed up, drove out and were pumped to find a campground that didn't have a "full" sign.  Needless to say they didn't have any actual sites left, just room for tents.  We did have a tent with us, but two adults, three dogs and a baby in a tent in September?  No way.  So we had driven for over an hour just to turn around and drive home again, completely defeated.  But wait the camping excitement wasn't quite over yet, before we even hit the highway our truck kinda broke.  And by kinda broke, I mean a rather large piece half fell off (picture below).

After using a hammer and a chisel to literally smash this huge piece off we finally made our merry way home.  Baby headed to bed right away, lucky us this was the one and only trip that she literally screamed the whole way home, so she was pretty worn out.  Perhaps she knew that we were trying to go camping and she really wanted to go and was upset that we were on our way home.  After grabbing a beer from the cooler and before we started unpacking, I said "Fuck this, we're camping.  Who cares if we're in our carport?"  We pulled the chairs out of the trailer, grabbed the baby monitor from in the house, unloaded the cooler, BBQ'd up some hot dogs and eventually crawled into the trailer bed (with the three dogs).  I'm sure our neighbors thought it was a little weird to see us sitting around in our carport eating hot dogs at 11 o'clock at night, but making the best of a bad situation was such much fun :)

We stuck pretty close to home for the rest of the weekend.  It wasn't the weekend that we had planned for Dustin's birthday, but I think he had a good time.  He keeps saying he did anyways and he did manage to bank several hours in video games.  I think that the little bit of adventure that we did have was bad enough that neither one of us wanted to have any more :)  Needless to say, Happy Birthday Dustin!  I'm glad you were born this weekend many, many moons ago :)

Reading is not a sport.

A few years ago I was talking to a friend of mine about how much I like to read and they began "the competition".  Every time I say I like to read, the person that I tell (whether I know them or not) usually has the same reply "I like to read too, I read more than you.  Have you read this, how bout this, how bout this?  No.  See, told you I was a better reader than you".  Do you have any idea how many books there are?  Just because I haven't read all of the same ones that you have doesn't mean I am a "bad" reader.  A guy I went to college with actually argued with me for well over an hour when I told him that there was no way his prof (who worked full-time and had a family) comprehensively read 10 full length books a day (or it might have been week, either way).  Perhaps he was a speed reader, but even then the key word here is "comprehensively".  Reading is not a competition people.  Reading is a hobby.  Reading is something that you do to sit and relax.  Nobody reads to be the best at it or to be able to say that they've read the most books.  In fact I like reading because it is one of the few things that doesn't involve any competition (despite those who try so hard to make it one).

I have read a lot of books.  I know that there are lots of other people who read and who read a lot too and I am sure that they read more than me.  My problem lies with those who will argue that they are such a "good" readers because they read soooooo many books and then they go out of their way to tell me that they are a much better reader than I am, and then I find out that they only read books written for 13 year olds.  Come on people...  Twilight???  An adult reading teen fiction is like a monkey peeling a banana, it's an mediocre task to get to what you want. Now don't get me wrong, I read my fair share of teen fiction, in fact I've read a lot of it.  Harry Potter, Vampire Diaries, Percy Jackson, Bartimaeus, Eragon, and of course the coveted Twilight.  I've got quite the collection :)  I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with reading these books, I'm just saying I don't think the definition of a "good reader" is someone who strictly reads books that are several decades below where their reading level should be.  I may have read Harry Potter, but I have also read War and Peace (I like to think that the two compliment each other nicely, Napoleon's march on Moscow - Voldemort's march on Hogwarts) and Moby Dick (fighting the white whale - fighting the evil wizard *haha*).  My personal definition of a "good" reader is someone who reads a wide range of books (at all levels), understands them, learns from them, and most of all enjoys them.

//:end.vent

Returning to Normal...

Woo Hoo!!!  5 and a half weeks of recovery later and I am officially allowed to return to "normal" physical levels.  Though "normal" will be a toned down version of where I was before I had to have surgery, "normal" is much better than "taking it easy".  I am officially allowed to return to the softball field, still no tackle football or cage fighting, but running bases is finally OK!  Long walks and short runs are also back in the mix which is good for me, Missy B and my puppies.  It's still a long cry from the hour long sweat marathons I was doing 3-4 days a week, but at least it's something.  I just hope I am not too out of shape after almost 8 weeks of laziness (3 weeks pre-op, and 5 weeks post-op).  It will be a few more weeks (2.5 to be exact) before I will be back to full capacity, that is if I remember to keep it toned down a little.  I have a slight tendency to overdo it if I'm feeling alright while I'm doing it (this resulted in some problems after my c-section).  Though I do feel that I have learned my lesson and I have a strong dislike for being "laid up".

I must say, I effing HATE recovery.  It's not so much the pain, or the actual surgery itself, it's the last few weeks when I'm feeling fine and knowing that I still shouldn't be pushing myself too hard.  I just never know where too hard is before it's too late.  I have been taking it really slow, like turtle pace slow.  Muk Muk and I did a few easy laps around our neighborhood the other night.  These laps can be a pretty good work out if you speed walk/jog pushing a 25 lb baby in a stroller, which is what we used to do, Muk Muk likes to go fast :).  Last night I played a game of softball making sure I was aware of how my body was feeling throughout the whole game.  I was more worried about stretching and tearing something than I was about getting hit by the ball.  Today I'm feeling fine, not sore in the slightest which is a really good sign.  Over the next two weeks I'll be able to build up to the renewal of my gym membership which I will only be doing on a month to month basis as last time I only got 2 months use out a four month membership grrrr...  Ectopic pregnancy was timed perfectly to screw me out of half my membership and those corrupt gym owners don't cut you any slack at all.

The only good thing about having surgery was the immediate drop of 5 pounds, literally over-night.  After they suctioned out all the blood that had built up in my belly and removed the "problem", the swelling went down almost immediately and I was glad to say I was 5 pounds lighter.  I had been pissed off at those 5 pounds for over a month already as they were the last 5 to a total of 50!  Yeppers, I lost 50 pounds.  I had gained a lot of weight with my pregnancy, 3 months of no exercise (as per doctors orders) followed by 6 months of bedrest will do that to someone who just wants to eat and eat.  I had gained 40 lbs to be exact.  

After I had Haven I was completely disgusted with myself and I did everything I possibly could to not turn into one of those "fat moms".  You know the ones.  They were "normal" sized until they had a baby and then five years later when their kid is starting school they still look like they are pregnant and all they do is blame their kid for making them fat.  After five years, it's not your child's fault any more lady!  I thought it would be impossible for me to get rid of that much weight little alone get back into the physical shape that I was in before I had Haven, but here I am.  Despite some minor setbacks, I am in even better shape than I was before I had the Muk Muk and I'm lighter too!  I just hope the last 8 weeks haven't ruined 8 months of hard work on my part, though I'm sure getting back on the fitness band wagon will be easier this time as I actually miss it.